one sided accounts on events of my life

It's two in the morning and I can't sleep. There's a giant jigsaw puzzle in my head that I can't put together. I'm not good at it. Or, am I just afraid to put it together. Am I? If I am, why? I never had a plan on who will I be when I grow up. I turned out OK. Not great, but ok. What I'm trying to say here is that things will be ok, whether or not you have a plan. Not all things that happened are well planned. Not everything have a reason. Maybe the pieces of the jigsaw puzzle are meant to be just a piece of a puzzle. They are not destined to form a bigger picture.

This is my first post in years. Many things have happened since then. I got kids now, Tsugtsug and Binog. Only last May, I decided to move back to Philippines. I should come up with new title for this blog soon. Honestly, with all the social networking sites like twitter and fb, I'm not sure what's left for me to share on my blogs. But fb starts to feel like class what you don't want to attend but you have to. I started to censor the things that I share there to the point that I rarely share things in fb. I even contemplated on deleting my account. Well, back to my blogs. I wanted to give them revive them but at the same time I don't want them to be just medium for my negative thoughts.

Well, this is too much for my non-sense. All I wanted to say for now is I'm back.

This is from my archives. I was so lazy today, I don't even want to turn on my camera (in my standards, in means very lazy). The shot was taken at the foot of Merlion, the shape was created by the waters coming out from Merlion's mouth.

Lately, pangs is so obsessed with the "religion". She was making so much research just to prove that there is nothing to doubt about our faith (especially because of some greedy author whose initial is like a database to me). This may or may not help, but here are some passages that I came across.

A psalm of David.
1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
3 He restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.
4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.


I have not read the book nor seen the movie, so I'm not in the position to argue about it. But, the mere fact that he is trying to raise doubt about my faith, I think I have the right to express my beliefs. I used the word trying since even in his website he never explicitly said that what he wrote was true, he just said thet what he wrote was fiction but we will never know if it is true. For me, it is half fiction, half lies. I asked my supervisor about him, he told me that there is nothing about him, about his works. What made him rich and famous was the controversy about his works.

Here is a qoute from his website,
HOW MUCH OF THIS NOVEL IS TRUE?
The Da Vinci Code is a novel and therefore a work of fiction. While the book's characters and their actions are obviously not real, the artwork, architecture, documents, and secret rituals depicted in this novel all exist (for example, Leonardo Da Vinci's paintings, the Gnostic Gospels, Hieros Gamos, etc.). These real elements are interpreted and debated by fictional characters. While it is my belief that some of the theories discussed by these characters may have merit, each individual reader must explore these characters' viewpoints and come to his or her own interpretations. My hope in writing this novel was that the story would serve as a catalyst and a springboard for people to discuss the important topics of faith, religion, and history.

See the irony, how come that a story about a unreal figure with unreal actions can be a catalyst for REAL aspects of our lives. Following the premise, an unreal character like donald duck may be catalyst for us to discuss politics. I did not bother to watch its movie cause for me it another donald duck film, full of quak quak quak.

As usual, I can't sleep again. I guess I'm not used to sleeping without hearing the sound of the tricycle as they race against each other. Hay... ( I can't even remember how many times I used that word in just one month here). There is so many things I missed in manila, well aside from pangs, my family, my inlaws. Here are some non-pangs related things that I missed:
1. Meryenda, well in Singapore there is no official break time except for lunch break. Although when I'm in CBP, there are time that I was able to take coffee break in the afternoon. In DCE, wishing for meryenda is hopeless. We even have to travel at least 15 minutes just to find a place to eat during lunch.
2. Enterprise Tower 1, yeah yeah yeah it is a bit pangs related but aside from that it is really my favorite building. Of course there are other buildings more beautiful that enterprise but like your favorite pair of sneakers, it is simply your favorite.
3. Our garden, I believe most of the lawn was covered already by the peanut grass. That is one thing I really look forward seeing when I go home.
4. Driving, nothing compares the feeling of being in control when you are driving. You can go fast or slow depending on your mood.
5. FX, shuttle, vans - public transport here is kinda boring. So slow, so mabait. No excitement at all.
6. cheap food - jolly jeep, karinderya, turo-turo call it what ever you want but their turon, banana cue, BBQ or just plain boiled egg are simply delicious and very affordable. Who need a hawker full of mami?
7. sleeping on the way to or from work.
8. NSDG - after we decided we are going to get marry there, NSDG has become my sanctuary. Whenever we had misunderstanding I always go there, eat hopia and coke outside the church.
9. Kakanin - who can resist sapin sapin with latik ng nyog? or palitaw or just kutsinta with nyog? wow sarap!
10. Manga with patis & asin - ok, bagoong will also do but for me patis and asin is the best sawsawan for mangga.
11. Jollibee & Mcdo - their burger may be bland, but a little unhealthy food every once and a while is not bad for you. And it is nice to think that if you can't decide what to eat, there is always the bee or that guy in big shoes will come to the rescue. It is so expensive to eat in McDo in Singapore, I had once and thats it.
12. Pinoys - pinoys are always fun to work with. With the exception of some AHs, most pinoys are good office mate. It is always nice to have a little chit chat with your officemates.
13. TV - local shows here are way too boring compare to what we have. They may be a rich but when it comes to entertaiment, we still rule!
14. Our house - I miss thinking what to do with it, cleaning it I really missed our house.

I'm sure there are a lot more things that I missed about pinas. I'm sleepy, so that will do it for now.

I can't sleep, I think it will be great to continue our story.

After that great night, here came the confused stage. At that time, we had our own lives. Our first instict was to zip our mounth, waiting for a sign. I was the first to give up. I sent her a message asking how she is and I told her that for me I found it weird and we should at least talk about it. I guess after two days of wishing that she would consider "us", I found a strength to talk to her, and tell her that I do like her. Of course at that time I can't say that I love her, or she is my life, my everything.
After work, we decided to walk around. We ate dinner and then visited bookstore. While I was looking at a book about modern houses, I realized that not only we have the same preference when in comes to houses, I actually, at that very moment planning to build a house for us. It was the first time I thought of pangs as my wife. And again, I found myself wishing that night will never end.
Weeks has gone by since that day, many things has changed. But as we spend more time together, I realized that I want to grow old with her, spend my lifetime with her. After having coffee with her friends, I ask her if we could go take a leave the next day. Go out of town. Tagaytay was our destination. I dont have a car, so we had to commute. After almost getting lost, we finally found the place, Sonya's Garden. We ate lunch. After that we sat in the beautiful garden. There I asked her if she would like to be mine. It was September 10, 2004,there at Sonia's Garden in Tagaytay, we officially became a couple.

And even we had each other, we still ecountered many problems, many glitches. But one thing remained the same, I always dream that we will grow old together, in a modern house we both design, with our kid and grand kids. And I always know that time will come, and I also know that we will be holding each other hands just like we did in Manila Peninsula, just like when we start dreaming together.

1. (x) Crashed a friend's car. if father's car count, crashed it on my first date with pangs, roni's wedding.
2. ( ) Stolen a car.
3. (x) Been in love.
4. (x) Been dumped. opo, 2 out 6 relationship I had. may pattern pa nga eh, 2nd & 4th
5. (x) Shoplifted. counted ba yung 1-2-3 sa jeep?
6. (x) Been fired/laid off. tapang kasing sumagot sa boss eh, kinabukasan may termination letter na ako. did not bother to sue them, ayaw ng mother ko eh.
7. (x) Been in a fist fight.
8. ( ) Snuck out of your parent's house
9. (x) Had feelings for someone that didn't have them back.
10. ( ) Been arrested. not yet and hopefully not here in singapore, masakit atang mapalo ng cane.
11. ( ) Gone on a blind date.
12. (x) Lied to a friend.
13. (x) Skipped school. feeling ko kasi yung allowable absent ay kailangan kong gamitin.
14. ( ) Seen someone die.
15. ( ) Been to Canada.
16. ( ) Been to Mexico.
17. (x) Been on a plane.
18. (x) Purposely set a part of yourself on fire. pag walang kuryente, para mawala pagkainip.
19. (x) Eaten sushi. tried it but I dont like raw food.
20. ( ) Been skiing.
21. (x) Met someone in person from the internet. not from the internet, but from phone. and the date was a total disaster.
22. (x) Taken pain-killers. yep, but only when it really really hurt. I hate taking medicines.
23. (x) Love someone or miss someone right now. so much..
24. (x) Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by.
25. ( ) Made a snow angel.
26. ( ) Had a tea party.
27. (x) Flown a kite. hobby ko to nung bata ako, i even have this gurion (big kite).
28. ( ) Built a sand castle.
29. ( ) Gone puddle jumping.
30. ( ) Played dress up.
31. (x) Cheated while playing a game.
32. (x) Been lonely.
33. (x) Fallen asleep at work/school.
34. (x) Used a fake I.D. during high school, para makapasok. madalas ko kasing makalimutan yung ID ko, kaya gumagawa ako ng gatepass ko!
35. (x) Watched a sunset.
36. (x) Felt an earthquake.
37. (x) Touched a snake.
38. (x) Slept beneath the stars. with in the school grounds pa!
39. (x) Been tickled.
40. (x) Been robbed.
41. (x) Been misunderstood. a lot of times!
42. (x) Petted a reindeer/goat. my friend used to have a pet goat!
43. (x) Won a contest.
44. (x) Ran a red light.
45. ( ) Been suspended from school. almost, pero nakalusot eh.
46. (x) Been in a car accident.
47. (x) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night. one pint lang? konti naman..
49. (x) Had deja vu.
50. (x) Danced in the moonlight.
52. (x) Liked the way you looked.
53. ( ) Witnessed a crime.
54. (x) Questioned your heart.
55. ( ) Been obsessed with post it notes.
56. (x) Squished barefoot through the mud. may malapit na rice puddles samin eh.
57. (x) Been lost.
58. ( ) Been to the opposite side of the country.
59. ( ) Swam in the ocean.
60. (x) Felt like dying.
61. (x) Cried yourself to sleep.
62. (x) Played cops and robbers.
63. ( ) Recently colored with crayons.
64. (x) Sung karaoke.
65. (x) Paid for a meal with only coins.
66. (x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't.
67. (x) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out your nose.
68. ( ) Caught a snowflake on your tongue.
69. (x) Danced in the rain. you should try, great feeling
70. (x) Written a letter to Santa Claus. di naman sumasagot eh..
71. ( ) Been kissed under the mistletoe.
72. ( ) Watched the sun rise with someone you care about
73. (x) Blown bubbles.
74. ( ) Made a bonfire on the beach.
75. ( ) Crashed a party.
76. ( ) Gone roller-skating.
77. (x) Had a wish come true. yep, yep, yep
78. ( ) Worn pearls. di siguro bagay sakin!
79. ( ) Jumped off a bridge.
80. ( ) Ate dog/cat food. i heard they taste really good.
81. ( ) Told a complete stranger you loved them.
82. ( ) Kissed a mirror.
83. (x) Sang in the shower.
84. (x) Had a dream that you married someone. it came true!
85. (x) Glued your hand to something. clumpsy kasi ako eh!
86. ( ) Got your tongue stuck to a flagpole.
87. ( ) Kissed a fish.
88. (x) Sat on a rooftop.
89. (x) Screamed at the top of your lungs.
90. ( ) Done a one-handed cartwheel.
91. (x) Talked on the phone for more than six hours on one occasion.
92. (x) Stayed up all night.
93. ( ) Didn't take a shower for a week.
94. ( ) Picked and ate an apple right off the tree.
95. ( ) Climbed a tree that had a tree house.
96. ( ) Been told by a complete stranger that you're hot.
97. ( ) Ever had a one night stand.
98. (x) Ever missed someone so much it still hurts to think of them.
99. ( ) Ever loved someone that you knew wouldn't love you back.
100. ( ) Ever been to a professional baseball, football, or hockey game in a stadium.
101.( ) Went hiking in the mountains.
102. ( ) Smoked a cigar.
103. (x) Had a crush on someone you worked with but never told them. secret, adyan asawa ko, baka masapok ako! pero matagal na yun! :)
104. ( ) Wished you had the chance to change your profession.
105. ( ) Ever cremated and kept the ashes of a pet you cared a lot about.
106. ( ) Wished you could live your life over again beginning at age 21.
107. (x) Been baptized.
108. (x) Rode a horse.
109. (x) Sent flowers to someone you never met. Actually never met before, I gave a flower to this girl I just saw in the party. It turned up that she was my teacher's niece.

If I were a painter
I would paint my reverie
If that's the only way for you to be with me

We'd be there together
Just like we used to be
Undertneath the swirling skies for all to see

And I'm dreaming of a place
Where I could see your face
And I think my brush would tak eme there
But only...

If I were a painter
And could paint a memory
I'd climb inside the swirling skies to be with you
I'd climb inside the skies to be with you


No, I was not angry with anyone. I just miss my wife so much. I revisited the first blog entry of pangs about me. Until now I can't believe she is talking about me in that blog. I just hope I never disappointed her. I just hope, 10, 20 years from now she can still see the same qualities she saw when she wrote this. As for me, I'll try to be that person again, try to be my pangs dream boy again.

Reading that entry again, I remember how we started. It was 27th day of August of year 2004. It was the the first time I saw Geri wear a skirt, she was beautiful. My mind went blank as I looked at her sitting across me in the lobby. I never realized that she noticed that I was staring at her. Until now I can't describe the feeling. It was like seeing the person you really love walk the aisle towards you. Of course at that time I never thought we will end up as Mr. & Mrs. Arenas. At that time I'm just mesmerized by her. Before I knew it, I was teasing her. To be honest, I was trying to flirt with her the whole day. And when I got the chance, I took it. I held her hand, praying that she wont get mad at me. She didn't. I felt so good, and at that instance I forgot everthing. I just wanted that moment to last forever. I even forgot the fact that our boss might saw us, as we sat outside the bar, holding each other hands. I believe he saw us, but he decided not to make a comment or anything. Eventually, he became one of our godfathers. Well, there are two things I should be grateful to him, it was his treat that night that is why we were there in the first place and for not saying anything. If he spoke a word, things may have turned up differently. And before that night ended, we talked on the phone, still teasing each other. It was when I held her hand that I knew it was her that want to be with forever. It was when we were talking on the phone I got a hint that, maybe we will be together forever.

And now, we still don't know what tomorrow might bring us. But I know, just like that night of August 27, 2004, No matter what happens one thing remains true. I still want to hold my pangs' hand.

I was at my room when I heard a familiar sound coming from the living room, it AI night. Atleast, for a while I can stop longing to be hope. It was doing fine until Elliot sung Home by Micheal Bubble. I was not really into Micheal Bubble (pangs hate him) but this song really capture me. If I was alone in the living room, I might have cried. Getting a job in Singapore sounds really great, I was very happy when they said I got it. But working here is exact opposite. I really miss everyone back home, I really really miss my parents, in-laws, sisters. And my pangs, I'll do everything just to be with her again. I miss her so bad that sometimes I wish my EP will be revoke, and I can go home to her. bring out your umbrella, for the next 7 months i'll be singing this song...

Another summer day
has come and gone away
In Paris or Rome...
but I wanna go home
...uhm Home
may be surrounded by
a million people I
still feel all alone
just wanna go home
I miss you, you know

And I've been keeping all the letters
that I wrote to you,
Each one a line or two
I'm fine baby, how are you?
I would send them but I know that it's just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Another aeroplane, another sunny place,
I'm lucky I know
but I wanna go home
I got to go home

Let me go home

I'm just too far from where you are
I wanna come home


And I feel just like I'm living
someone else's life
It's like I just stepped outside
when everything was going right
And I know just why you could not come along with me
This was not your dream
but you always believed in me...

Another winter day
Has come and gone away
in either Paris or Rome
and I wanna go home
Let me go home

And I'm surrounded by
A million people I
still feel alone
Let me go home
I miss you , you know

Let me go home
I've had my run
baby I'm done
I gotta go home

Let me go home
it'll all be alright
I'll be home tonight
I'm coming back home

You might be wondering what on earth does "la" in the title means. Honestly, I don't think it means anything, it is just an expression here. I'm here in singapore and you are most likely to hear that very often. This is a new chapter for us and this will be the most difficult. But before that, let me "make kwento" about the previos chapter of our life, the newly wed phase. I was not able to blog about it, I was too busy being happy. I was so great. We had to do our own menu for the week, bought groceries, watch DVD all day. Pangs, Mrs Ann Gretchen Arenas is such a great wife. She exceed my expectations. And she is such a great cook, suprisingly. I love most of the food she cooked for me, there some exception thou hehehe. And she showed so much patience on my cooking, kahit di masarap nakangiti pa din siya. And she took care of me very well. And she has shown me how she love me the way I am.

Thank you so much my wife!

Now, we are miles away from each other yet she is the one giving me strength. She is carrying their team's laptop from makati to antipolo just to talk to me. She never missed to remind to eat , she is still taking good care of me inspite of the distance. I miss my pangs so much.

Pangs, thank you for everthing. Thank you for showing me your love and caring, kahit pa malayo ako. I miss you so much. I love you!

I wanted to blog about my new life but I dont know how to start it. So instead, i just took a online personality test. Here is the result

Green

You're green, the color of growth and vigor.

Good-hearted and giving, you have a knack for finding and bringing out the best in people. Green is the most down-to-earth color in the spectrum — reliable and trustworthy. People know they can count on you to be around in times of need, since your concern for people is genuine and sincere. You take pride in being a good friend. For you, success is measured in terms of personal achievement and growth, not by status or position. Rare as emeralds, greens are wonderful, natural people. It truly is your color!

Try it!

 

nyek ako pa yung wala sa picture! loL! 

tagged by geWi
1.What time did you get up this morning?--- 4:45, nagprapraktis na akong gumisng ng maaga. ako ng ang tigagising next year eh..
2. Diamonds or pearls?--- diamonds, pwede ba Moissanite na lang para wais, kasing ganda pero di kasing mahal
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?--- Harry Potter with pangs and ate chary, naks nakiki-ate na ako!
4. What is your favourite TV show?--- CSI Vegas and anything na nasa NGC. i am a documentary junkie.
5. What did you have for breakfast today?--- Vigan empanada.
6. What is your middle name? --- Capitis
7. Favourite cuisine?--- filipino siguro, ang corny ba?
8. What foods do you dislike?--- anything raw!
9. Favourite drink of the month? --- mango shake, 250 bucks ata to!
10. What is your favourite CD at the moment?--- wala eh, but gusto ko yung akin ka na lang by itchy worms!
11. What kind of car do you drive?--- i don't own one but paminsan minsan i borrow my father's starex
12. Favourite sandwich? --- hinde ako mahilig sa sandwich eh.
13. What characteristic do you despise? --- mayabang na wala naman, grrr!
14. Favourite item of clothing?--- t-shirts pero ang konti ng tees ko! hehehe
15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation where would you go?--- BOHOL, dun ang honeymoon namin eh! can't wait!
16. What colour is your bathroom?--- sa ngayon blue, but next year it will be burgundy and black!
17. Favourite brand of clothing?--- wala eh but i always want to have a girbaud na pants. uy, malapit na pala christmas..
18. Where would you retire to?--- mango farm somewhere in the batangas.
19. Favourite time of the day? --- uwian!
20. What was your most memorable birthday?--- my last birthday, ng-EK kami!
21. Where were you born?--- Lozada Clinic sa Palasan, Valenzuela M.M.
22. Who do you least expect to send this back to you? --- wala eh, si pangs lang naman ngbabasa ng blog ko.
23. Person you expect to send it back first? --- sinabi ng wala eh! kulit!
24. What fabric detergent do you use?--- we use ariel pero hinde ako naglalaba eh! dapat yata mag aral na ako lol!
25. Are you a morning person or a night person?--- night person.
26. What is your shoe size?--- 9 or 10 usually
27. Do you have any pets?--- si Rambo, half german half askal
28. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with friends and family?--- me bago akong bahay at cellphone!!!!!!
29 . What did you want to be when you were little? --- pilot, capt. raymond arenas
30. How often do you get a haircut?--- i been trying to avoid that.

 

hi there..

lately, lot of things have been happening between us. we've been very busy not only with our work but also with our wedding. and it was only the start of it. we get busier as the date comes near. and i know that inspite of that busy schedule, we never failed to tell how much we love each other. but just in case (thou i promise that i wont), i will missed telling you that, please have faith that i will always love you.

pangs, thank you. you always prove me how much you love me, how much you care for me. and for that, im so grateful.

good luck to us pangs. we are both aware that it will never be an easy journey for us. there will be hard times ahead of us. problems that might test our relationship. and lots of compromises to make. just dont lose your faith in us and never give up.

i love you so much pangs.

We have been busy lately. I never got a chance to write in my blog. To be honest until now I have not much to write. I promise to write all of our (pangs and I) adventures next time, the EK, Red Box, Wedding Expo etc next time. For now, I'll just post this song. It is Fallen by Lauren Wood. It is a good weeding song. We might play this song on our wedding if we can afford a band.


I can't believe it
You're a dream coming true
I can't believe it
HOw I have fallen for you
And I was not lookin
was content to remain
And its ironic to be back in the game

You're the one
Whose led me to the sun
HOw could i know
and I was lost without you

And I wanna tell u
You control my brain
And you should know that you're life in my vein


You're the one
Whose led me to the sun
How could I know
And i was lost without you

I can't believe it
YOu're a dream coming true
I can't believe how I've fallen for you

And I was not lookin
was content to remain
And its ironic to be back in the game

Hey, I'm turning 25 next week....

You Are 25 Years Old

25 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

ok, it is not original. it is a line from Notting Hill but there are times that it feels that things that are happening between me and pangs are too good to be true. Well what can I say, she is Pangarap, my dream come true.

I guess most of you knew this by now, WE ARE ENGAGED! We were sitted in the bench, just outside Enterprise, 9 in the evening of January 31, 2005. And next is history as most people says. It may not be the most perfect propossal I can come up with but I can say that it is the only one that I will make in my lifetime. I had already decided that she is the one from the first time I held her hand. It is hard to explain it, I just feel that I want to be with her for the rest of my life. That just like magic, I see my selft growing old with her, being with her every minute, holding her hands. Well, at that time I had no idea that I can actually come true. At that night, and the whole weekend after that, all I do is dream of her, and how good it will feel to be with her. Now, that dream is coming true.

"So people are meant to spend thier lifes together..... ", we are. Iloveyou pangs ko. I love you very much.

happy valentines day my pangs.

I really can't describe last week. It was pangs' first week here at Pramerica after having 3 months of vacation. I'm so happy that we can now see each other at least 5 days a week. But also last week, we got so many things to accomplish. First we needed to fix most of the errors found by our users at the same time we were supposed to study mario's code since it was also mario's last week. As a result we had a 7 to sawa schedule. Here is a wrapped up of my week..

pretty in pink monday
pangs' first day in the office and she was wearing a pink blouse. She looks so pretty in that dress and to be honest, the only reason I decided to write this "wrapped-up" is to be able to mention that.

a usully tiring tuesday
it is a quite normal day for me. Normal since I do stuff's that I normally do everyday like eat, drink, debug.. The only difference is that our working sched, it started at 8 in the morning and it ended 10 pm. "utang na loob pa namin at pinauwi kmi that day"

chef angelo's wednesday
sir p and j treated us at chef angelo during lunch. I've never seen so much food in my life. Ok, that is an overstatement but they order so much food that we have a whole and a half pizza, a whole plate of pasta and chicken as a leftover.

22 1/2 hour thursday
it was very long thursday. Many things happened, some were good, some were not so good, some I can't mention here, some I rather not.

we've been here or not friday
I was a good friday for us, we never had a fight inspite of arguing whether it was our first time in mexicali or not. Now, we can both agree that we had been there.

you're my savior saturday
pangs' saved my life, literally. Thanks pangs. >:D< im alone sunday
my mother almost walk out this morning, it seems to her that noone wants to celebrate her birthday with her. We all agreed yesterday that we are going to eat for lunch but my father came home only this morning. My sister woke me up and told me that my mother have been crying since and decided to go else where alone. Thanks God that we were able to convice her to wait for us or else we will go with her without taking a bath first. hehe

And thats my week. Ok there are things that I did not mention but those are things that I will not be able to forget. No need to put it in a journal.

So many thing I wanna write. Every morning, I always have this idea of what I will write. Sometime it's about my dreams, or something about me that I haven't told you, or just a qoute from a song, or a description on how happy I am on what pangs did for me ( or to me... hehehe) .

...... but at the end the day I lost all of my ideas. At the end of the day, my brain was so drain that only I can only think of two things, that is "im so tired" and that i miss my pangs so much! I always hope that it is already 2006, at least, by that time, it doesn't matter how bad my day will be, I know that at the end of the day I'll be in my pangs arms.

pangs, missyou na!

I never knew such a day could come
And I never knew such a love
Could be inside of one
And I never knew what my life was for
But now that you're here I know for sure
I never knew till I looked in your eyes
I was incomplete till the day you walked into my life
And I never knew that my heart could feel
So precious and pure
One love so real
Can I just see you every morning when
I open my eyes
Can I just feel your heart beating beside me
Every night
Can we just feel this way together
Till the end of all time
Can I just spend my life with you
Now baby the days and the weeks
And the years will roll by
But nothing will change the love inside
Of you and I
And baby I'll never find any words
That could explain
Just how much my heart my life
My soul you've changed
Can you run to these open arms
When no one else understands
Can we tell God and the whole world
I'm your woman, and you're my man
Can't you just feel how much I love you
With one touch of my hand
Can I just spend my life with you
No touch has ever felt so wonderful
(You are incredible)
And a deeper love I've never known
(I'll never let you go)
I swear this love is true
(Now and forever to youto you)
Can I just see you every morning when
I open my eyes
Can I just feel your heart beating beside me
Every night
Can we just feel this way together
Till the end of all time
Can I just spend my life with you
Can you run to these open arms
When no one else understands
Can we tell God and the whole world
You're my woman, and you're my man
Can't you just feel how much I love you
With one touch of my hand
Can I just spend my life with you
Can I just spend my life with you
Can I just spend my life with you
(Forever here with you)
Can I just spend my life with you
Can I just see you every morning when I
Open my eyes

I wrote this one last November 2 but never really finished it..

"Last Sunday, I was invited by pangs' mom to go with them to Norsagaray. We got lost! to make things worst, we cant get exact instuction how to get there. all they can say is "Deretso lang po". Bastos, muntik ka kaming makarating ng fairview kaka-deretso namin! lol! When we finally reached Angat and nakita na namin yung farm ng tito ni geri, we den look for the way in. Sabi ng father ni pangs sa gilid daw yung daan, pero kahit anong tingin namin, ala kaming makita na daan! Masukal yung "daan" na sinasabi, Ano ginawa namin? E di ano pa, dumeretso, if nagsasalita yung pick-up nila malamang ang ngreklamo na yun! Pag dating namin sa dulo ng road, DEAD END! hehehehe, So tawag na si Ate Charry ( kapal, nakiki-ATE lol) sa tito nila, sabi sa kanya kailangan namin bumalik dun sa main road, ng U-turn na kami, habang pabalik kami, sabi ng Daddy ni Pangs "parang me dumadaan naman dito", sagot ni geri "cyempre tau!" hehehhe"

im been looking forward for this year since November I think. Why? well I'm not sure if can reveal it here this early (pangs haven't mention it in her blog) but it has something to do with changes and plans.

It is January 1 today and some says that it is a good time to look back on everything that happened last year. So let me present you my Year-Ender Special! hehe

1. Last year is a "TRILOGY ENDER YEAR" with both Matrix and Lord of the Rings ended this year. I do have a luxury of watching both movies on its first week of screening..

2. 2004 is also my first year as a contructor and my first client is Prumerica. But before that, I was first interviewed by Sir Felix and Sir Phil and that was the day I first saw my pangs, and for me at that time she is simply unattainable.

3. August 27, 2004. I will never forget that day. After months of "pagpapa-cute", I finally got to hold pangs' hand. It is the first time I got really excited on just holding someone's hand. I don't know but there something I felt that time that make me want to hold her hand for as long as I could. I guess you know what it is.

4. SONYA'S GARDEN, on one friday afternoon, pangs was officially mine!

5. Pangs first birthday with me, and we were at Isabela. FYI: to this date, Isabela was the farthest placed I had been.

There a lot more things I will definitely remember about last year, may be I'll mention them next time.

misyounapangsko!

ng resign na si pangs! :( mag aaral na lang cyang magluto, mag alaga ng bata, hehehee actually she just want to work from home ( malayo sa kin para maka concentrate cya).

Since ngayon na di ko na cya officemate, here are the things I will miss:

eating breakfast with my pangs
seating beside my pangs while she smokes.
waiting for her at the top of the escalator, ala cruel intentions
riding the elevator up to 34th Floor, sana nsa 100th floor kami
printing anything so that I have an excuse to go to their area.
net send, softros or local 504
the "patakas" na kiss and the "patakas" na hug
the sleepy look oops mamimis ko ba to, parang hinde kasi kahit naman sa inyo you have this look eh.
the lunch out esp. pag kaming dalawa lang, sorry yomars, minsan iwanan ka talaga namin hehehe
sharing Cajun with my pangs, or french fries with ... ( french kiss? lol) dip!
pagkanta ni pangs...
her somehow seating, somehow lying position. I'm not talking about ***, thats how she seat while sleeping, i mean working...
the sound of her ..... jaw
seeing her in custome every "Pramerica Get Together".
waiting for her at the lobby, minsan kailangan ko pa syang tawagan just to wake her up, nakatulog kasi sa restroom eh....
walking sa walkway, looking at every person na makasalubong, baka kasi may ka-officemate kami eh...
eating at greenbelt after work, window shopping sa power book and Avant..my pangs!
being caught by sir J...
being tease by the whole IT dept.
did I already mention the elevator ride... I'm gonna miss that!

I will miss her!



tbc....

Ang haba ng araw na ito. Probably because bored na bored ako dito sa opis! I been watching the clock tick since 5:00, yehey 5:52 na! I want to go home and sleep all I want and forget my work lol! I think burn out na ako sa work lately! bagal ko ng gumawa, o baka tumatanda lang ako! lol! Di din ako makaisip eh, kahit hinde sa work, like this blog, ala me maisulat kaya ang tagal tagal since my last post! pag sinabi ko naman sa tropa ko, asbihin nun eh "inlove eh", pathetic naman! Pero honestly, despite nung pressure sa work, Im so happy lately, Thanks to my pangs, me reason me pumasok, at me reason din y gusto ko laging umuwi agad! hehehe hinde bola yun ah! hehehe.

pano, hangang dito nalang! 6 na eh! mag aaya na talaga ako! lol!

Since di pa nag rereply, post ko muna accomplishment ko for today, para sa monday sabihin ko ke sir P
1. Kumain sa bday trit ni mister somthing(lol, di ko alam name nya)
2. basahin ulit yung polcontract at palitan lahat na panagalan ng company!
3. kumbinsihin ang sarili na me nagawa
4. tipidpc
5. hanbapin website ni bob ong at magbasa na joke, nakakatawa at korni
6. mag pa cute

last night, actually few hours ago we had misunderstanding. I somehow predicted that sooner or later our differences will surface. We are not perfectly made for each other and it is up to us what are we going to do with. About last night. I'm not sorry I reacted that way but I wish I didnt. I should have made you feel that it is still your choice, that you are still be the one to decide who are you going to talk to, or chat with, and I know it doesnt always have to be me.

pangs, about last night is actually no big deal but it is a wake up call for us that we have differences. What are we going to do with that will be our choice in the future. It will be up to us if our line will be "inspite of" or "because of"

iloveyou pangs!

And though you don’t believe that they do
They do come trueFor did my dreams
Come true when I looked at you
And maybe too, if you would believe
You too might be
Overjoyed, over loved, over me

miss you pangs!

I can love like that
I would make you my world
Move heaven and earth if you were my girl
I would give you my heart
Be all that you need
Show you you're everything thats precious to me
If you give me a chance
I can love you like that

:) myn! hope to see you soon!